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· Registered
931 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
What a bloody nightmare.

I only joined iTunes because I read an Apple article and a Paypal article both claim how I can buy stuff using my Paypal account.
Brilliant! I can get rid of that $16 sitting in there for somethin useful!

Or so I thought...

After several painful hours of having my face scrunched in confusion while opening up window after window and searching through (utterly useless) help screens I started chatting to the iTunes staff:

Welcome to iTunes Store Chat!
Hi, my name is Guy P.. It'll be just a moment while I review the comments you provided.
Gavin Shoebridge: Ok, no problem.
Guy P.: Hello Gavin
Gavin Shoebridge: Good morning.
Gavin Shoebridge: Or afternoon.
Guy P.: "Figuring out how to pay for music with my paypal account."
Guy P.: I would tell you to not use paypal from personal experience
Gavin Shoebridge: Too late, I've had it for years.
Guy P.: paypal doesn't really do anything for you
Guy P.: not on iTunes
Gavin Shoebridge: The reason I joined iTunes was because an Apple article said I could use Paypal to purchase music.
Guy P.: it is great for doing online transactions with no name companies
Guy P.: you can
Gavin Shoebridge: Thank heavens. I'm aware of it's shortfalls, but I still want to buy music using it if possible.
Guy P.: you will have problems with it
Guy P.: but sure
Guy P.: you can
Gavin Shoebridge: By problems, can you elaborate? It didn't say anything in the Apple article about computers bursting into flames etc.
Guy P.: not on our side
Guy P.: but there
Guy P.: when you have Paypal we send a validation to their system to confirm purchase
Guy P.: they then contact the form of payment you have on file with them
Guy P.: I talk to customers all day long with validation problems with their system
Gavin Shoebridge: Interesting. And yet disconcerting. I don't envy your job (and I thought mine was bad).
Guy P.: they just have to wait for their system to catch up
Gavin Shoebridge: Ok Guy, I'll take your advice on board and I'll give it a go, but I won't be upset if it doesn't work.
Guy P.: especially when we are sending them thousands of transactions at a time
Guy P.: here is a big tip
Guy P.: if you want to protect yourself ...
Guy P.: all you have to do is make sure you sign out of your account before closing iTunes
Gavin Shoebridge: Wear a condom?
Guy P.: remember that iTunes is an application and it isn't on the web
Guy P.: lol
Guy P.: that too
Gavin Shoebridge: LOL
Guy P.: if you leave the account signed in .. anyone with access to that computer can open iTunes and make a purchase
Gavin Shoebridge: That's good advice, I'll do that for certain.
Guy P.: just sign out before closing iTunes
Guy P.: you don't need to be signed in to play your purchases
Gavin Shoebridge: Ok. I understand. First step, how do I make the first step?
Guy P.: the second thing I would tell you ...
Guy P.: get rid of gmail email
Guy P.: I would suggest using your ISP email
Guy P.: or just using another name for your account name
Guy P.: gmail email accounts have been hacked in the thousands recently
Gavin Shoebridge: Uh OK (not said with confidence on my part).
Guy P.: your account name doesnt' have to be an email address
Guy P.:
Gavin Shoebridge: I see, OK I'll change it.
Guy P.: you can edit your account info with this link I just sent
Guy P.: just trying to help you out
Gavin Shoebridge: Cool. One more question - Can I use Paypal to purchase music here in New Zealand (something I should have checked to begin with I suppose)?
Gavin Shoebridge: Via iTunes I mean./
Guy P.: I think Paypal supports it
Guy P.: but again
Guy P.: it won't protect you any more than a regular cc on iTunes
Guy P.: and you won't have to worry about the Paypal sur charge
Guy P.: saves you money in the long run
Gavin Shoebridge: I know, the only reason I'd use Paypal instead of a CC is because I have some money just sitting there on Paypal. Whereas my wife tells me off if I use the credit card.
Guy P.: I don't use my cc on anything online other that really reputable larger companies
Guy P.: but I understand your point
Gavin Shoebridge: Is Apple a reputable company?
Gavin Shoebridge: (I'm kidding)
Guy P.: you can edit your billing info at anytime
Guy P.: sometimes we are
Gavin Shoebridge: Lol
Guy P.: if you steal iPhones from us .... we get upset
Guy P.: lol
Gavin Shoebridge: As would I!
Guy P.: but yes
Guy P.: in iTunes
Guy P.: at the top toolbar
Guy P.: select "Store" and from the drop down select "View Account"
Guy P.: you can edit billing there
Gavin Shoebridge: I did that, but only saw the option for a credit card, no option for Paypal.
Guy P.: ok
Gavin Shoebridge: I'm having another look now.
Guy P.: that means Paypal hasn't approved it in NZ
Gavin Shoebridge: Oh big flaming cock.
Guy P.: the other option would be to only use iTunes Gift Cards
Gavin Shoebridge: That sounds about as fun as contracting HIV.
Guy P.: that way you wouldn't have to use a cc
Gavin Shoebridge: I'm not worried about using the credit card (if I can justify purchases to the wife) I just wanted to put my Paypal money to good use.
Guy P.: many people use them
Guy P.: you might want to contact PayPal to see if they have plans for iTunes in NZ
Gavin Shoebridge: After all that effort, as well as confusing the hell out of my Windows machine with Apple software! Argh!
Gavin Shoebridge: Ok mate, I'll go and email some Paypal people and see what they say.
Guy P.: sounds great
Guy P.: have a nice week Gavin
Guy P.: take care
Gavin Shoebridge: Thanks anyway mate. Later!
Guy P.: later

· Registered
931 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
It gets worse too. I just used Paypal's "support" (in the very loosest sense of the word):

Sarah - PayPal : Hi. I'm Sarah, PayPal’s automated customer support assistant. How can I help you today?
You :Hello Sarah, I presume you're a computer?
Sarah - PayPal : Hello. I'm a virtual person. My software allows me to help you with your PayPal questions. How can I help you? Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You : How do I buy music on iTunes with my Paypal account?
Sarah - PayPal : I've just opened the Send Money page for you. You might need to log in to see it.
Would you like to know more about that?
You : I'm not certain we're on the same page so-to-speak Sarah.
Sarah - PayPal : Okay.
Before we continue, was the information I gave you helpful?
-Yes, this was helpful
-No, this was not helpful
You : No, this was not helpful
Sarah - PayPal : I'm sorry that wasn’t helpful. Would you mind rephrasing the question?
You : I'd rather not. I'm not an idiot.
Sarah - PayPal : Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You : There is, read the first question I asked you;.
Sarah - PayPal : Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You : Oh God give me strength.
Sarah - PayPal : Absolutely. Okay. Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You : Why are you holding your abdomen in your avatar? Are you pregnant?
Sarah - PayPal : PayPal places holds on transactions for various security reasons. To narrow down the possibilities, please tell me if you are:
-Sending money
-Receiving money
You : I suspect you're on drugs, judging by the inane grin on your face. Are you completely toasted?
Sarah - PayPal : Oh no! That really doesn't appeal to me!
You : After dealing with iTunes support staff, now Paypal support robots, it appeals to me.,
Sarah - PayPal : Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You : Is it too early (10am here) to start drinking from stress?
Sarah - PayPal : I can't tell you, but where I am it's 14:56.
You : How would I best kill myself to avoid using Paypal and iTunes together?
Sarah - PayPal : I recommend you speak to a real person about it as soon as possible.
You : Yes please.
Sarah - PayPal : It may be that your account has a security issue or you're over your Sending Limit.
Are you trying to send an amount that is above your monthly limit?
You :
Sarah - PayPal : Then you must be having a security issue. I've just opened the Resolution Center for you. You may need to log in to see it.
If PayPal has placed restrictions on your account access due to security reasons, you can resolve the issue by clicking Learn why your account access is limited on the page I just opened for you. We will review the case and send you an email with the outcome of the review.
Have you already visited the Resolution Center and completed this process?
You :
Sarah - PayPal :Okay, then you can start your case on the page I opened for you. After that, PayPal will take up to three days to review and resolve it.
You : You've been as useful as a condom machine in the Vatican.
Sarah - PayPal : Thank you very much, I work at it a lot.
You : Can I speak to a real person now?
Sarah - PayPal : Would you like to contact PayPal by:
You : No, by live chat.
Sarah - PayPal : Would you like to contact PayPal by:
You : Neither.
Sarah - PayPal : Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.
You :Oh God.
Sarah - PayPal : Absolutely. Okay. Let me know if there is anything else I can do for you.

And now, thanks to the glory of Internet "Help" pages and "Support" chat, I've given up. Grrr.

· SPAM Cop
1,500 Posts
Sarah... I met her once long ago, but her name was Eliza and she was a shrink.

Eliza said:
Eliza: Hello. I am ELIZA. How can I help you?
You: I don't think I can be helped.
Eliza: Why do you not think you can be helped?
You: Because your cousin Sarah could not help my friend Gav with his Paypal issues.
Eliza: Why do you say your friend gav with his paypal issues?
You: Because iTunes wouldn't let him pay with Paypal.
Eliza: Do any other reasons not come to mind?
You: No other reasons don't come to mind. Your grammar is atrocious and you smell like the smoke was let out.
Eliza: What resemblance do you see?
You: Well, a series of small mosfets, each charred to oblivion.
Eliza: Please go on.
You: And an unpleasant aroma.
Eliza: Please go on.
You: And on and on.
Eliza: Please go on.
You: I don't think I shall. Goodbye.
Eliza: Why do you not think you shall goodbye?

· Registered
5,007 Posts
I'd say something comforting, but I'm too busy ROFLMAO

· Registered
251 Posts
HAHAHA, computers are fun to tease, but they are only as smart as the person who programmed them. Great thread though. LOVE IT! HAHA

I never buy anything online with any type of account. Even if it is insured, if you lose out they want proof of some sort. Not to mention the thousands of hackers from China, Russia, Estonia, Ukraine, Brazil and other places that are looking for free easy money from the Internet anywhere they can get it.
However, if you only have like 10 bucks in your paypal account and keep it close to that at all times, you may lose your ten bucks at some point, but its not much to break the bank sort to speak. It is just the risk is there with anything, credit cards to savings accounts, if used on line they are liable to be victim to some sort of theft eventually.
I used to keep up with the IT Tech website and see how many millions of accounts had been broke into in one month, or how many accounts from hotels or from ebay had been stolen. I don't anymore since it was the same story every month, millions upon millions of accounts had been compromised.

Use at your own risk kind of thing with purchasing anything off the Internet.

To get any music I want, I simply look for the videos of the music on youtube, then download the video (using mozilla downloader)
then get the free program that converts FLV to WMA and transfer the video to a sound file with the conversion program. Then burn it to disk with other songs and I have a full CD of music to listen to in my car.
Then if I can't find it on youtube, I just do a google search for the song I want to download, which someone always has a copy of it on their webpage somewhere, even oldies to the hottest new songs.
They might have it as a MP3 file, but again a simple free conversion program can convert it if your CD player doesn't play MP3.
That was all free, but it took me 5 minutes to do all the above.

Just something to remember if you don't have any account or don't want to pay for anything on the web. You can usually find it FREE somewhere on the web, whether its a program or a music file. I still go to the music store and buy the whole CD of any music I really want or like, but if they don't have it in stock or even heard of it, then I go elsewhere...the Internet.
I like Techno more than anything else, but I like most foreign techno music so they usually don't sell that stuff in America and I have to find it on the web.
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